The worst of the horror scenes involve dental chairs. They all had opted to play some other game that didn’t involve a cave, space aliens, or a mysterious Mr. Must be a programming glitch, every one of them mistakenly surmises. Which, suddenly, all the characters seem to be acquiring, often as a gift. I didn’t want to see Richie or the kids die, or even Leila, the good daughter to the horrible mother, but I was more than ready to see Irene sucked dry by blood-thirsty aliens in some dark, dank cave. We may even start anticipating, eagerly, their demise. We are not supposed to like the characters. By Chapter 11, I had a revelation about the horror genre.
And Reggie, the repairman, who is always broke and angling to get free drinks and free anything.īy now, we haven’t met a single character we’d like to hang out with in real life, not even Richie, because his luck really sucks and he just can’t keep his mouth shut around Irene, the impossibly awful mother-in-law. Meanwhile, we meet some locals: Martha, the snoopy spinster/hoarder/cat-lady hired to clean the cottage before the guests arrive. Richie heads out to the local pub, and it isn’t the escape he was looking for. The windows look like eyeballs, and something about the place just feels wrong. Richie also gets the notion he and his wife should get away from the kids and the mother-in-law, her mother, the awful Irene, but this snowballs into a long drive, with the mother-in-law and kids, to the cottage from hell.įrom the moment the hapless Richie sets off, we know the destination is going to be even worse than the road trip, and sure enough, that cottage is creepy. He deserves it, after the sympathy he *didn’t* get for his injuries. The nurses keep going on about this awesome Virtual Reality game, which makes Richie want to buy himself a VR game. They will never know! Except, oops, he ends up in the hospital with stitches in his scalp and something about a blood transfusion, with a mean doctor acting like it’s Richie’s fault they’re low on his blood type. Perfect chance to take that bike of his out for a short spin. It all starts when the wife and kids leave him home unattended. This story opens with a lovable and unlucky Everyman telling us how little sympathy he gets, and the more he confesses, the harder I was laughing. Tons of horror, too, but I’ll get to that later. How fun is it to imagine that an alien race left their bloodline here on Earth, and now they’re back, collecting blood from the RhNeg populace for some nefarious purpose? For years we’ve been ignoring those crazy YouTube videos about Merovingians among us, and by “we,” I mean the intelligent, well-informed readers of Perihelion Science Fiction. HUMANS WITH RHESUS-NEGATIVE BLOOD are descended from aliens.
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